Tag Archives: CML

I Lost it Today :(

17 Wednesday Dec 2014

Posted by in Cancer, Depression, Leukemia

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , , ,

Today was not a good day for me.  I guess all the troubles in my life finally caught up with me.

For those just finding out about this blog, I have CML, a form of Leukemia.  I was diagnosed with it this past February.  I’ve been taking Gleevec and until last week I thought I was doing pretty good.  My BCR AbL started off at 138 and had gotten down to .134 three months ago.  My last report last week the test showed that it went up to over 2. It was a big disappointment.  I go back in six weeks.

Last week was the beginning of my trouble when my 17 yr old daughter was involved in an accident.  It seems that an 88 yr old man pulled out in front of her.  My daughter is fine with the exception of some back pain in which she is seeing a doctor about.  This was my wife’s 14 yr old van that was totaled by the insurance company.  We do not really have the funds to get another vehicle at this time especially since Christmas is just around the corner.  Just don’t know what to do at this point.

And to add to already what’s going on I’m having eye issues and I’m going to have eye surgery the first part of January.

This is the Christmas season and it’s supposed to be a happy time.  It usually is but the last few years it get’s harder and harder to get into the Christmas spirit.  With my health the way it is and not knowing what the future holds it’s easy for me to get depressed.  I’m the father of three and I’m supposed to be strong and not show emotions but I’m here to tell you that it’s difficult for me to hold it in.  Especially today.

It was while at lunch today.  We were listening to the company choir sing some Christmas songs when it hit me.  I was remembering the times when my kids were younger and times were much different.  I got to thinking just how much longer do I have?  I was doing ok until the choir started singing a song that I haven’t heard since my childhood and that’s when I started to loose it.  Not wanting to show my emotions in public I had to get up and leave the table.  It took be several hours to get my act together.

Maybe tomorrow will be a better day.

Good News for Now!

24 Wednesday Sep 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , ,

Heard from my oncologist this afternoon. My levels has dropped down to .134%.from .734% two months ago. It’s still not zero but it’s slowly getting there. The doctor feels confidant enough to leave me on my current medication. The only thing that was discussed that I’m not to pleased with was the topic of another bone marrow biopsy. We will discuss this more in depth at my next doctor appointment in three months

No News Yet plus Furious

22 Monday Sep 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

, , , , , , ,

There’s a saying that no news is good news.  Well, in my case that’s not necessarily so.  I started several times today to call just to see if they had come in but I refrained from doing so.

On another note.  I am so furious right now I can’t see straight.  I have never had to deal with such things until my teenage daughter turned 16 and started dating.  These boys these days are so horrible.  A few weeks ago my daughter got a dear john text.  That within it self made me furious.  What a coward.  About a week later to my disappointment they got back together.  Guess what!  He did it again.  I wished I could put my hands around his neck and teach him the necessity of breathing.  He better be glad he’s away a college right now and not down the road where his parents live.  No one hurts my daughter and gets away with it.  This is part of fatherhood that I’m not prepared for.  Ho does one prepare for such things?

Thanks for following me!!

21 Sunday Sep 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

, , , , , ,

Went to the my oncologist last Wednesday.  He was not happy with my last results that was taken over two months ago. BCR ABl test results was .73% which I thought was pretty good until he told me it HAD to be down to zero and had to be within the first six months.  I was diagnosed in February so six months would make it in July.  I’m currently waiting for the doctor to call me to tell me what my results were last week.  If it’s not zero then I’m going to have to get on some other type of meds.

I don’t do this or any other blog for followers but just to be able to get things off my chest.  As I am honored to have each of you follow me I am somewhat surprised to see some what I would call super bloggers that are following me.  I’m really glad to have each and everyone of you on board.

Life Does Have a Purpose

14 Sunday Sep 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, , , , , , ,

Life has been busy and full of activities.  Work still sucks but I only have 3 yrs 11 months and 15 days left before I can retire at 55.  But who’s counting?

My health hasn’t changed much.  My eyesight has not improved much and I’m still taking ejections every month.  My CML is still not under control yet but I’m hopping that by my next doctor’s visit that will change.  When I was diagnosed my levels were at 138%.  At my last visit two months ago it had dropped to .73%.  0% is where it needs to be.  My next visit will be this Tuesday so I’m hopping for the best.

I turned 51 one month ago tomorrow.  For my birthday my son gave me two sets of tickets to a couple of Alabama games.  What is so special about this is that my son plays for the Million Dollar Band.  He is a senior this year and we have not been to a game with ticket prices being as high as they are we just couldn’t afford for the rest of the family to go.

My wife and one of my daughters went to a wedding while my parents, my other daughter and I went to the game.  Needless to say getting to our seats was an adventure within itself. Both my parents are in their early to mid 70’s.  The tickets we had were in the highest portion of the stadium that you could be.  I was really worried for my mom who has trouble walking long distances.  Once we finally made it to our seats we all had a great time watching the game as well as watching our son march on the field.  Couldn’t see him but I know he was down there somewhere.

As l’m going through the pictures of yesterday, I am reminded that life moves quickly.  It seems just like yesterday that my son and I was playing catch in our back yard.  Now I’m seeing him in full uniform marching in a college band.  Where does the time go.  I took a picture of my parents with my son and daughter.  As I’m sitting here in front of the computer editing the picture I realize that life does have a purpose.  My parents had a purpose raising me and now it’s my turn to raise my kids.  I think my parents did an outstanding job with me and I’m hopping I’m doing the same with my kids.  So far no arrest records have been made on either of my kids so apparently I’m doing a fair job.

Looking for a stress free zone.

29 Thursday May 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

, , , , , ,

The last month has been one of those months where nothing seemed to go right.  The last few weeks has just topped it all off.  

I had to have laser treatments in both my eyes and boy let me tell you what an experience that was.  Before my first treatment the doctor told me that there was no words in the English dictionary that would describe just how bright the laser was.  He was right.  I’ve never experienced anything like that before and I hope I don’t have to go through that again any time soon.

All the doctors seem to agree that the CML was the cause of my vision problems and not the Gleevec.  I am now back on my medications.  Although, I do believe my vision is getting a little worse as the time passes.  I don’t go back to either of my doctors until mid July.  

The weather here has been nice enough to ride my bicycle and I’m really glad.  It’s really been nice to be able to get out and do some riding to get rid of some of this stress that I’ve been having to deal with.  My job has really got me to a point where I’m counting the days until I can retire; 4 years, 2 months and 15 days.  In the last nine days I’ve been able to ride seven of those days at at least twenty miles each day.  I’ll be traveling to Dothan, Alabama on the sixth of June to ride in the Tri States Ride on the seventh of June.  I’ll be riding the 45 mile loop.

A lot of changes at work within the past month.  The manager we had resigned and now we have a new manager.  He’s got a military background and is very strict on policies and procedures.  Right now I don’t know if I like him or not.  I’ll have to give him another week or so.

The last two weeks I’ve been repairing air conditioning units on the roof of a warehouse.  Fifteen units to be exact.  Most has had bad compressors and or bad condenser fan motors.  It’s been a real hot job and we’re finally beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel.  However, rain has entered the equation and the lack of parts so we’ve had to put the repairs on hold until next week.  At least we’ll get a break for a couple of days.  

People keep asking me how I’m doing with my CML.  I’m doing good I guess.  Other than the eye problems and the leg cramps I’ve had no other symptoms of either the CML or the Gleevec.  I’m finally able to see some results of my bike riding plus the dehydration factor of being on the roof for two weeks has really helped out as well.  

Bumps In The Road

22 Tuesday Apr 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

, , , , , ,

It’s been way too long since I’ve posted anything. I’m still here and I’m still alive. As I’ve written before, I’ve been diagnosed with CML, Chronic Myloid Lukemia. I was on Gleevec for over a month when I started noticing my vision starting to get blurry. I thought my sugar was high or my blood pressure was up. My blood sugar was a little high but has been much worse and my blood pressure was normal. Over a period of two weeks my vision got so bad I couldn’t see the keys on my keyboard.  I looked up the side effects for Gleevec and there it was. Blurred vision was one of the side effects.   I called my oncologist and discussed it over the phone. He set me up to see an ophthalmologmists. I saw him and he sent me to a retina specialist.  All this to be diagnosed with peripheral diebetic neuropathy. The big question is what caused it?  Was it the diabetes?  Was it the Gleevec?  Or, was it the CML? 

I went to see Dr. Albert, the retina specialist and he gave me injections in both eyes to reduce the swelling and to stop the bleeders in my eyes. I have an appointment to go back in two weeks to start the laser treatments.  Since the injections I have noticed a small improvement in my eye sight. I have new glasses ordered so maybe I will be able to see more clearly once they come in. 

All the doctors seem to be in agreement that the CML caused the blurred vision and not the Gleevec or my diabetic condition. Although, the doctors aren’t going to rule out the diabetes as a contributing factor. All this time since the onset of my blurred vision I have been off the Gleevec for fear that it could be causing the vision issues. As of last night I started back. I feel much better about that. 

So, How do you feel?

21 Friday Feb 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, ,

I get this question all the time.  Before now I would always answer, “I’m fine”, or “I’m wonderful, how are you?” expecting the same type answer. I never expect to hear all their ailments when I ask someone in passing how they’re doing so I guess it’s appropriate for me to answer in the way I have in the past.  With that said, am I telling them a lie if I tell them I’m feeling fine when in fact I’m worried sick that the doctor’s are going to tell me that I have Leukemia and in doing so will these people get mad at me because I didn’t tell them when they do find out?

If someone asked me right now how I’m doing or how I felt, if I told them that I felt fine I wouldn’t be lying to them.  I don’t have any ailments to speak of.  So right now I wouldn’t be lying to them.  I have told a few people that I may have CML but it’s not confirmed.  It won’t be confirmed until one day next week.  By now I”m sure the word has gotten out that I’ve got Leukemia so I’m sure that when some people ask me how I’m doing it’s because they know and when I tell them that I feel fine I get some of the strangest looks. I guess they’re expecting me to tell them that I don’t feel fine and that I have Leukemia.

I don’t want to bore people with my ailments nor do I look for sympathy.  I do not want to be treated any differently than I have been treated at any other time in my life.  Yes, I have CML.  Yes, I could get worse but don’t treat me like I’m on my death bed right now because right now I’m fine.

 

Day 5

17 Monday Feb 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

, , , ,

I had my bone marrow biopsy today.  It was one of the most painful experiences I’ve had and not be doing something I enjoyed.  If you’ve never had one let me tell you what they did.  First they made me undress and put on a backless hospital gown.  The did give me a pair of disposable terrycloth shorts to put on underneath.  I lay there for a while until the doctors come in and he tells me to lay on my left side in a fetal position.  The doctor then injects the area on my hip with a local antithetic which hurt like hell.  Then the real pain begins when he begins to drill into my hip with some sort of needle.  That hurt worse than hell.  The whole procedure didn’t last thirty minutes but it felt like an eternity while he was doing it.  I call the doctor next Monday to make yet another Dr. appointment to find out the results.  

Trying to keep my spirits up. 

Day 1

13 Thursday Feb 2014

Posted by in Uncategorized

≈ 6 Comments

Tags

, ,

I titled this as “Day 1” because this is the first day as being diagnosed as having CML, Chronic Myelogenous Leukemia.  

This day started off crazy.  Last night and into early this morning we got over 4 inches of snow.  Roads were closed and almost all business were closed, including my Oncologist.  My appointment was at 9:30 am and I started calling around 8 am to see if they were going to be seeing any patients today.  To make a long story short, I was finally able to make an appointment for 2 pm today.

Due to the snow all the schools were closed and my wife was able to go to the appointment with me.  The doctor sat us down and was very through.  He went line by line and explained everything to us.  He answered all our questions and made sure we understood.  He had a since of urgency when he spoke and he knew without asking that I was deeply concerned with my health. 

Several years ago this type of Leukemia was quite fatal.  The survival rate was only three to five years.  Now the survival rate is much higher with a 95 percent rate. I’m not liking the “L” word but if I had to choose which one I wanted I think this one would be it.  A pill taken twice a day is not a cure but it will control the spread if they have caught it in time.  We shall know this answer come Monday.  I have a bone marrow biopsy Monday morning and this should tell me which stage I’m in.

If you are a praying person, I’d like for you to spend a moment or two saying a prayer not for me but for my wife and kids.  I have a set of twin daughters, 16 yrs old and a 20 year old son who are taking this pretty hard.  

TH