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Tag Archives: elder

One Day at a Time with Mom and Dad

11 Saturday Jul 2026

Posted by Tim Hughes Living with CML in Family, Life, Uncategorized

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Ageing, Arthritis, Dad, elder, Family, gardening, Grass, health, Lawn Mower, Life, Mom, Nature, Pain, Parents, Scoliosis, writing, Yard, Yard Work

Yesterday I got off to a later start than I had planned. I rolled up to my parents’ house a few minutes before 9:00 a.m. My goal had been to get there by 8:00, but I just couldn’t get moving. By the time I had eaten breakfast and made my second round of coffee, I was already running behind.

When I arrived, I didn’t see my parents’ car. Sometimes they park inside the garage, but most of the time it’s sitting just outside.

I unloaded the lawnmower, which takes a few minutes since it’s on a trailer. Once it was off, I moved it onto the driveway to make a few adjustments to the mower deck and ensure it was level.

Normally, by this point, Dad is already outside with me because his driveway alarm lets him know whenever someone pulls up. Since I hadn’t seen either of them, I figured one of them must have had a doctor’s appointment and had forgotten to tell me.

I started the mower and began cutting the grass. About thirty minutes later, I spotted Dad. Evidently, he had been outside the whole time working somewhere in the backyard. He was soaked with sweat. He had been picking up limbs to clear the way so I could mow the yard.

I immediately stopped the mower and told him he had done enough. I made him go inside where it was cool. I stood there and watched until I saw him walk across the deck and into the house. It was simply too hot for him to be outside doing that kind of work.

I mowed for a little over an hour before taking a break. When I went inside, Dad was sitting on the couch. He had changed shirts, but I could still tell he was overheated from being outside. I fussed at him a little for staying out there long enough to get that hot.

My poor mother was sitting on the other side of the room, bent over from the arthritis pain in her neck. She’s been dealing with that pain for several years now, and it just keeps getting worse. Unfortunately, there’s really nothing that can be done. She’s been rubbing Hemp cream on her neck, and it seems to help for a couple of hours, but the pain always returns.

Seeing my elderly parents in this condition always weighs heavily on my heart because I know the day will eventually come when they won’t be with us anymore.

Mom has been living with one kind of pain or another ever since they were involved in that terrible head-on collision back in 2014. She used to stand nearly six feet tall. Today, she’s barely five feet because of scoliosis and arthritis. She’s so hunched over and in so much pain. She refuses to just sit still. She wants to tend to her flowers and keep the house clean, but she’s reached the point where she simply can’t do those things anymore. Most days she ends up sitting in her recliner in the den, wishing she could still do what she once did.

Dad keeps talking about buying a new lawnmower. The truth is, he doesn’t need another mower because he doesn’t need to be cutting the grass anymore. But he refuses to slow down. He’s always got to be working on something. No one can convince him otherwise.

He’s a smart man. There’s a lifetime of knowledge locked away in that brain of his, and every now and then I still have to make a phone call and dig some of that knowledge out. I’ll definitely miss that someday.

After I finished cutting the grass, we were sitting on the back deck when I told him he didn’t need to worry about buying another mower. I told him I’d be more than happy to come up every couple of weeks and cut the grass for him. He seemed to appreciate that… right up until he asked if he could sit on my mower and drive it around to compare it to his old one. Before long, we were right back to talking about buying a new mower.

After everything was finished, Dad and I sat on the back deck talking for several hours before Mom joined us. A cool breeze had started blowing, making it comfortable enough to just sit and enjoy each other’s company.

We talked about life and the choices we’ve made over the years. We talked about my kids and the possibility of grandchildren someday since two of my three children are talking about getting married.

Mom quietly said she hopes she’ll still be around when my children become parents, but she isn’t sure that will happen.

To be honest, I have my doubts too.

But I’m still praying we’re both wrong.

Living With an Elder Cat

22 Wednesday Nov 2023

Posted by Tim Hughes Living with CML in Pets

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Tags

Cat, elder, Grumpy, Old, ornery

Living with a nineteen-year-old cat is like something I’ve never experienced
before. Every day there’s something new with him. He’s part of the family so we
feel that we have to deal with all of his issues, and I do mean issues.

Clyde has health issues. He has an enlarged heart; thyroid problems and he
has high blood pressure. He’s on three different types of meds three times a
day. Recently, he’s developed a weak bladder. When he goes into a deep sleep
his bladder leaks wherever he’s lying. He has taken over our bed and we have to
keep the bed covered with a tarp during the day to keep us from having to
change the sheets. He sleeps 98% of the time. The only time he gets up is to go
to the kitchen to eat. He’ll go to the bathroom and sit on the floor until
someone walks in there and helps him on the counter so that he can drink from
the faucet.

He is very vocal. He lets us know when his towel is wet so we can go change
it. He has a routine, and he knows when it’s time for his meds because right after
his meds he gets a hand-full of treats. He loves his treats. Taking the meds,
not so much. In the above picture, he had just had his meds along with a
hand-full of treats. He’s thinking that he didn’t have enough treats and wants
more.

I’ve heard cats living up to 21 years.  Knowing him, he’ll live long past that. He’s an ornery, old, grumpy cat. 

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